3 Girls and 4 Suitcases.
The snow had returned and with it some sense of my motivation. Yesterdays blog (or lack of it) was simply a refection on months of 'kidding' myself that I was great, catching up with me. I haven't been fibbing consciously, though and I know that most of the time I have been trusting that I am here for a reason-honest. I think that what happened, over the last couple of days, was an outward display of the anxiety that has tried to show itself over the last one hundred and six days. My constant refusal to acknowledge it got kicked into touch, with the help of some Bach Agrimony which allows you to feel what you are meant to feel-EEK. Sometimes I do my job too well but then again, sometimes I don't walk-my-walk with myself at all otherwise I would be able to say I was feeling anxious rather than pretend that I wasn't-right?
So, yesterday was an indoor day and after I had bawled my way through my meditation, I discovered that my lovely pal Audrey was on the other end of skype and so we connected. Initially. her questions were simple answered with tears but as the call progressed, she had me giggling as she always can, about the absurdity of trying to be anything other than what and who we are. She and I have been great buddies since we did our Reiki training together and we laugh about whether we're the only sane or insane people in the room, sometimes.
That wonderful woman had an email waiting for me to open this morning, to motivate me to move forward with all the plans we talked through yesterday. Thanks pal-looking at the snow outside, it may be an indoor day again and I will make a list.
I am a list-person and it shocked me to realise that I haven't made one in weeks. I never get anything done unless I have a list-yikes. Today, I will make a list.
After my skype call and some lunch, Jen and I made a wee start on our Christmas decorations. I will try to post some pics of them on FB for you to see. Jen's great at art and did some snowmen and Christmas trees and I did some tiny crochet scarves for pine cones....wait and see.
A day at home made me realise how cold the house is during the day. We wrapped up but by the time evening came, neither of us could get warm, despite snuggling together under the fluffy blanket. We may have to notch up the heating if we are going to be home as our fingers need to be able to function-lol.
Alison spends her days in a nice warm school then a daycare so she couldn't understand what all the fuss was about.
Jen and I nipped down to the shop and back, for rolls for Ali's lunches. Brrr. It was pre-snow but it was still very chilly. I joked 'who needs botox' when we were nearly home (It's a 50 min round trip walk) because my face was frozen with the wind-chill.
And so it is another day and I will see what today brings. I may have to fight my way into the garage to see if there's a snow-shovel. I may build a snowman. I have to go buy milk and I have to make a list.
And a wee fact to finish this blog. Our street has streetlamps only on one side. Jens observation, not mine.
Much love,
Lxxx
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